Branding Wisdom

I'm a fan of the wisdom of the Tao. There is knowledge, and understanding that knowledge reveals its relative value. Wisdom is simply non-linear understanding that is operational on multi-dimensions. It is NOT omniscient nor anything finite but knowledge being expressed by being, characterizing its gestalt, as more than the sum, at best an homage to mystery and paradox. Finally, its essence, is the unfolding presence of being.

The Alo Drop

I'll leave this on your doorstep then, since you won't answer my call
a mind fuck is one whose utter remains still for only so long
and then in a confluence of events lets the utter slip, her purpose all along
now the fun has just begun, as she humiliates a man for being human
No shame for the lack of propriety, she's found her gilded horse
to make up for the white one, whose knight walked on premise
There's ignorance, naivete, and pretense; you see it around you all the time
What has ignited this anger flaming at your feet, is seeing it manifest
as a poison; harming trust, just because revenge picked your play today.

Her brand is euphemistic, adorned with echoes of great anticipation
and utterly false, meant to seduce a man into weakness, to die thereby
with uttering everything that tells him he failed her, and must pay like this
in every way that adds humility to his horror, for not having seen it coming.

7/2014, rjduberg

On Desire

I think its important to be able to discriminate between one's desires understanding the boundary between the lower and the higher. The following text was just recently published by a friend of mine today, Lee van Laer. He puts this in perspective for me, maybe for you too?

"Ordinarily, I am always measuring myself by my desire; and my desire is always to somehow to allow myself to fall short.

What there is a need for is to go one step past what I want to do, which is almost always selfish in one way or another. This needs to be looked at; it's so habitual, really, that I rarely notice it. I take my selfishness for granted; and that marks the line where hell's property begins.

There is a satisfaction in the fulfillment of duty. I have been brought to this planet to learn how to take one step past what I want, into what is good for others. It's this service that counts.

I'm tempted to live in a secret, personal space. It has many comforts; and many things that help me are imparted there. But the intention of inner work is to bring me into relationship, first with myself, of course — but then, always, with the outer, into which I ought to bring a little of the light I am sent."

There is another angle about this which has to do not with falling short, but fulfilling a promise (duty), but also once again taking it one step further. In committing oneself to producing more than what is asked of oneself, one consciously creates a dimension of freedom in which in the process of making an exchange one's conscious awareness operates creatively which would otherwise not be subject to that higher state and challenging tension.

Where is Heaven?

In the vein of christianity, we are introduced to a paradise that exists for us in the afterlife. Not really of particular interest or value for a 10 year old, whose own personal paradise was in the process of coming completely apart with the advent of Dad's PKD and ESRF. And over the years, no one has ever given any kind of satisfying remark or answer to the question of Heaven.

To begin with, Christ upset the apple cart when he said the Kingdom of Heaven is within us. The possibilities as I see them are that he must be referring to the real and active contact between myself and higher consciousness. Clearly, this connection exists and happens within because no where in the external world have I ever seen an entry or doorway marked Heaven or God.

So then within ... so far its only been during short periods of higher awakening, when my being was overwhelmed by presence that I have been given any clue to what I want more than anything else in the world and that is to have a conscious connection with Christ, to speak to him and with him face to face. Everytime I find myself reverberating with the disappearance of time, quiet, breathing, listening to my heart beat in my ears, the high pitched hiss of my mind like the background radiation behind the Universe's Big Bang, there is at least another moment of equipoise, a juicyness to abiding in the moment that is beyond refreshing and ultra seductive having the power to immediately quash and quell any and all reminders to duty in the business world of man.

We'll see just how much impact took place for those attenting this morning in the men's locker room in cyberville.

Answer to Jivana's question regarding the difference between male and female discussions

RE: Jivana's ... "If anyone is wondering why I ask this, I think there may be some interesting subtleties revealed about the difference in the energetics of mind driven dialogs, and feeling driven ones. Just maybe..Any thoughts about that Robert?" Well to start with, I think I just crapped my pants, LOL. Sheezuz Jivana ... does the power of your being know NO boundaries? Wow ... such a question. You know it's been a very long time since I've received such a important and powerful invitiation like this that nearly blew my noggin off. Bare with me while struggle to regain my calm and breath. 

You know, I mean to answer your question, I can't think of a greater example than what just happpened. Maybe you'd need to be here next to me to observe the distinction between being driven mentally(intelletually) in contrast to getting driven and feeling it. For sure, discussion between men rarely include silent pauses allowing a person to process felt sensation as a natural part of the discussion. I'm not saying that men don't still do this but they do not share it and they certainly don't draw attention to it. 

This brings us to what to make of the possibiity for men to properly engage their femiinity in the felt sense in discussion and relationship, and how to support it for the natural soulful liberty it affords one's being. I can imagine what is going through the minds of those men reading my words right now who make up the bulk of typical male interactiveness which could be characterized as competitive, and emotionally immature to some degree with almost every single man. Compared with women, where their discussion is punctuated continuously with certain sometimes infintesimal pauses in which focus is shifted entirely on the heart with the support and full appreciation of those women listeners present. Masculine energy does not curl up in a cuddling circle. It's potential was found in being unbreakable, unstoppable, overpowering, and noble. That's a historical perspective however I don't see much that has changed. The impulse still remains, untrained, unconscious, undifferentiated and not sublimated. The obvious results of such concentrations of masculine vs feminine energetically in discussion groups can be worked out along the characteristic dimensions as I have begun to suggest.
Part of what remains to be cleared before we evolve sexualpolitcally has to do with expectations. It's hard to imagine what precepitious condition could account for men anticipating a felt meaningful sense from his compadrades in the splitsecond pause required for the heart to breath and speak. The best I've encounterd so far in terms of an overt acknowledgement indicating that a friend of mine had "GOTTEN" a felt sense loud enough to say something about it was nevertheless constrained by a competitive context and a visual orientation. Given the modality expectation you can see how his statement, "Look at him, you can see the wheels turning inside his head." represents those cognitive channels. 

The only suggestion in support of Jivana's issue here for men would be to quietly focus over the next few days in your conversations with other men on your heart and the degree of energetic harmony being radiated within it as well as between your heart and the other's. Some of you may find this a rather impossible request, as you simply return to your dualistic rationalizations in progress. 

I do the best I can at keeping myself exposed to feminine energy and beingness because I have yet to come to any satisfactory balance within myself on this issue, but I hope I have been of some help and provided a little clarity for Jivana's issue and for the benefit of the men she is addressing.

Relating Religion to Spirtuality

There is always some extraordinary figure/teacher at the beginning of all religions. I have not studied this to be sure but I would hazard a guess that none of those teachers had anything to do with the religion which formed after their passing (so why wouldn't Buddhism be a religion?) I've never met a religion that hadn't completely distorted and corrupted the original teaching. Spirituality is something akin to the science of spirit/truth/Self/knowledge. While there is NO formal structure therefore no leader and no follower, if there is a legitimate point to spirituality then it exists squarely in our desire to explore and discover the truth about truth.

Again, Spirituality is matter of personal desire to go beyond the known and find for one's Self. Religion is really result of powers needing to co-opt the popular teaching, repackage it and sell it to the masses after issues regarding integrity are replaced by one's of obedience.

Regarding the Law of Accident, the Law of Fate, a question regarding the law of Attraction

... you take something powerful like that out of context and the next thing you know everyone MECHANICALLY ASSUMES they understand enough of it to explain exactly how it exists in their lives, when in fact they have nothing remotely the same as the source of that in the beginning.

@Colleen ~ For ordinary men and women, their lives can be said to be under the law of accident. It's only when a man becomes #4 and begins real work on his being and self-remembering that he begins to come under the law of fate in which this saying shared/quoted by Esoman becomes something reliable to consider. The law of accident could be understood then to be THE basic characteristic of ordinary men/women in which it follows that their being attracts hardly anything at all, all is mechanical, with no conscious order, and whatever is present in their being at any given moment is completely a function of the reactionary nature of their many different I's, imaginings, false personalities, etc. etc.

Once a person begins to gravitate to the work and begins to develop their being consciously, life will begin to show up more along the vein of how Eso talked about it. It's important to understand that it is here and increasingly so that if one doesn't like what one is attracting that evolved consciousness will provide a person with the energy and higher support required to change one's being if one so desires.

Now it's important to recognize here that a certain principle or wisdom seems almost to obvious to mention here, regarding the possibilities in this transformation. The wisdom is simply that one rely less and less on belief and open more and more trusting of the unknown, the mystery, and the limitlessnss which is accessible in higher states of consciousness and being. If a person is not willing to embrace the relativity required in accurately relating to the cosmos then their work will lack the necessary force and sensation to be of any real use.

Such liberation therein exists where I don't have to be judged by others regarding my story or religious narrative, especially if that narrative is rooted in separating dichotomies of a past gone era. Like the notion that if you believe Christ to be your savior, etc you will enjoy eternal life. What a foul joke that is. At least its coming to an end, soon.

Obviously, there's more to the work than simply learning more and distinct things about myself and the cosmos, but clearly that process will never end, and my contact with higher influence, divine grace, God, or whatever will only be as real as open is the space in me regarding reverence and respect for the unknown above.

A Voice Holy

The voice is never holy is it?
Lying about hearing god ...
So sad my reason, and I
Without divine counsel.
For god suffers not me
Nor anything it seems.
Being the transcendent
Completion, and perfect.

The voice speaks just lies
projecting our deep need
smart but stupid to believe
adaptation is not accidental
for an unrecognized god realm
stage where all shadows halo
can be found on christian brow.

Could faith be reasonable?
If in fact a perfect being was
possible, the best argument
is based in design of nature
reflecting GREAT DESIGNER
as source and possible creator.
Those who live in faith speak
with impunity to those awake.

Don't think my rebellion runs
easily amuck, my opposition
protesting ugly pretense of faith
is with respect to the big risk
with what seems far more real
and natural, reflected as clear
rule of mind to compute facts.

In the end, death gets last word
regarding the question we face
whether death is a real lie or not.
But faith isn’t close as an answer
And, why would it be necessary?
And how would it change things?
No, death is death, faithful or rot.

© 2004, RJDuberg

Difference of One

Imperial Beach Sky Fire

 "The true basis of religion is not belief, but intuitive experience. Intuition is the soul’s power of knowing God. To know what religion is really all about, one must know God."

And yet, all one has to do is but briefly introduce themselves again to whatever religion, (they all suffer those who believe) to verify that the basis of religion at present is belief. Intuitively, I agree without a doubt that all religious beliefs came after the fact, and in a manner of speaking represent the extent and limit man's mind has come to know in relationship to language. The process of cognition is mechanical which processes language and seeks to understand meaning through interpretation.

Ask yourself if there aren't higher and more evolved methods and ways to reach a speakers genuine meaning in his language and speaking? I say it is this intellectual process which follows listening that constructs belief, on an unconscious level, the level of that's just the way it is. If a person is not awakened to this FACT as well as empowered to develop a more robust and higher dimensional heuristic, any effort or talk of change for such a person is destined to be unrealized.

If we understand belief as representative of a mind which has not gone beyond a focus of BEING RIGHT, this shift in perspective alone will pull back the drapes enough that the real work can begin. From that point, one's mind is not operating strictly from the place of verifying by mental cross referencing backwards into the past across the matrix of mental constructs which are collectively NOT HIS but echoes and copies of ideas he's heard from someone else.

The difficulty in evolving one's consciousness here has to do with this cognition's automatic operation combined with men's identification with this noise of the mind. It has been my experience that intrinsic to the shift away from this state is the way the silence of a still mind begins to prevail as the dominant feature in one's conscious awareness. Alone with this is a transformation in one's self expression which shifts from being associative and mechanical to being a meditation in which one's words have a conscious emotional intent in which simultaneous to speaking there exists extra attention which focuses on the listening taking place. In that mix, the metric of simply being right or correct no longer covers the scale of meaning possible.

Celebration and presence, authentic being and intimate satisfaction, and one's higher self and function are found in that higher conscious state. One other important characteristic of this shift from ordinary consciousness to higher consciousness has to do with the emergence of a holistic and self-realized sense of being, one in which the person begins to consider themselves as Source of their experience fully responsible, and along with that a true integrity without which this higher state would collapse with our going back to sleep rendering us falling to an even lower state than where we were at before.

I have always felt betrayed by religion, especially Christianity. I mean you have to ask yourself if Christ was in fact an expression of the Absolute's supreme intelligence, why this issue regarding belief wasn't addressed with more eloquence and articulation. He didn't and it wasn't something that became part of the cannon, leaving the possibility of faith leading those with sufficient capacity for evolving higher consciousness in the dust, abandoned to be forgotten on history's waste heap. Surely, a truly enlightened master would have addressed this inevitability as part of his teaching. The fact that he did not, itself lends itself to view religion as indefensible in the sense of it's intuitive basis in the beginning being incomplete and hardly the divine revelation we're given to believe. 

What's missing from this golden barreling tube breaking swell with an offshore blowing towering ocean mist behind high and to the rear, is Self.

Hard to say that in other empty landscapes, unless certain tones and spatial relations are present, creating an inight into, Self.

There is nothing like having a passionate obsession with something. Guess I should feel lucky music happened to add delight for this vacation.

Healing Code

AT some point there is always a call for putting one's records of the past back together in order and well stacked.  Here is a call to an issue I have for health while I deal with ESRF. Been on dialysis for a year now. Been on a waiting list for 180 days. The road to getting a transplant done is not clearcut or simple by any stretch of the imagination. For the last 3 years I've pretty much been dominated by the wild fires in this domain of my life. But I'm finding some breathing room now and my intellectual insight and understanding is beginning to reflect some expansion and evolution.

I've got to give credit to friends in my life that matter: Stephanie, Colleen, Mom, John, Billy, Evelyn, Heidi, Trayvon, as well as my sister.


Integrity

Integrity is the shining star
blazing a path for the spiritual
to fix and maintain the joy
it is our higher self we call
May yours come to mind
so that recognition plays
front and center today
there's no time to waste.


Fighting exhaustion is not good when trying to ascend and evolve, whatever ...

Here is the repository of a new and quite significant change in my ontology. The subjectivity is still there. More than anything today was a moment when consciously relaxing that I was suddenly in the presence of an ex-girlfriend named Stephanie. And I suddenly recognized what it was about her that was so valuable to me at certain moments of vulnerability. She's got the best mom vibe I've ever witnessed.

Thanks Steph..xoxo

Some reflective composing...

Appearing arbitrary are these bounds
coming in and out of a veiled backstage
in streaming movements weaving
chaos out of order and order out of chaos.

What other possible purpose could apply
comprehending the relativity of the present
squeezing the entire flow down to a drop
and then we quench our thirst from that?

It's never enough, and how could it be?
as we try and drink our fill from a dream
while the raging torrent of the stream is
all around us, ourselves, lush fluidness.

The drip drop little squeeze was hard work
and who in their right mind can fathom
how the reverse allows for the gush of us
We're clearly machines at our core.

Nothing to build in the radiance sought
But the cost is our ability to tolerate
a friction and discomfort as we cogitate
learning how so much of life is mechanical.

The beginning is always short and small
A process that grows and grows wetter now
cooling and extinguishing the fires of hell
we replace ignorance with visions of reality.

rj

Noise in the First

The noise has to always hiss
during the greatest peak here
of changing the changing ray
where nashing grinds IT to dust.

My engine racing, wind bracing
speed blazing ... a synchronized
inside concert hall constrains
our vibrations moving infinitely.

The divine source, muse sings
a sound that lifts my heavy heart.
I am surrounded by nothing big now...
except a noisey crowd at the curve.

I expect another Goddess to know
a Crash Surprise from nowhere
on a day of days smelling of bliss
her lovely music, blessing, and grace.

1/2016 rjduberg

These Times Reached

Daily reductions, so annoying, a brutal evil it seems
lay down all your arms, and witness how little
your world pays attention to what matters, no reach
this is an insideous defeat notwithstanding irony
Shadows by ego, value to conform, entropy.  

Dig in then ... poetry asks too much I say.
In good with a serious muse, and writing love
in so many urgent and different musical ways.
Arising in a Great Symballic Crash
and a war against war, echo of irony.

These times and their overall rush is good reminisce.
while these times are specifically different
The remedy of language is in a long focus
balanced with a short one, makes us an ascendency.
Through language this portal reigns in higher consciousness.

The real entryway is hidden behind an understanding.
It isn't enough to know something or even know of it.
Yet, without such linguistic referents we're also reduced.
One begets the other, as understanding follows, so distinct.
Romantic blossoms here, tho' most fall in and down, sadly.

So easy for most not to even get this far, part of the Construct.
One success will bring a desire to make homage to "God".
This pink cloud is a spiritual distraction, highly addicting
And really of no use without extracting the higher lesson.
Never quit, never stop, know thyself - by your reach, ascend.

© 2/2014 rjduberg

Cosmological Vibration Wave Form

A lot has happened since I last wrote last. I just reviewed the Teahupoo Big Wave Rides in slow motion. Aside from the purely aesthetic visual impression one takes in, from the cosmological perspective  (defined as an integration of everything inbetween the Highest and the Lowest), the wave is a terrestial form which is elemental and on a planetary level. Compared to what we normally refer to as vibration, which we energetically feel with frequencies and magnitudes orthogonal to the next higher octave, our planet. This is an example of cosmological perspective used as a context for making inter-level connectinos. I guess what made it really special was the gravity associated with the Teahupoo wave. Along with its extreme magnitude on its cosmological level, are the ordinary interference waves which are still clearly present, except that the influence from them is infinitesimal leaving one's focus PURELY on the IDEAL being manifested TEMPORALLY (also known as Temporary).


Another instance to illustrate or add another level's fractal piece to the IDEAL can be witnessed in nuclear fission/fusion. Now there is another elemental wave form, cosmologically on a level higher than the planetary, which is our sun. YET, nevertheless, part of logic is the categorical connections, categorical meaning unique and unitary. In this case we're talking about vibration and wave forms, and I can think of no better fractal or cosmological angle than teahupoo's waves (vibrations) which belong to our planet to express difference in order of magnitude. Same thing, Vibration, can express itself quite unique different between orders of magnitude. The question then is what is it that allows us to make these abstract connections which give us leverage cosmologically? Called As Above, so as Below.

So back to your reply...  Put her words in perspective because she certainly isn't doing much contextualizing of her remarks. Why is that important? Part of the focus that is achieved by including the context for your words, just immediately means enhanced understanding and a decreased incidence of interpretative work required. Thus one speaks English as a rule here in America, and Spanish in Mexico. Ok, you say fine, as obvious as your example was isn't Love just as obvious and the proper perspective for her statements?

Well if it was, she made an awful lot of judgements about it didn't she. And, I assert dualistic reasoning is like that, in which someone creates a shadow to their presence and expression. Maybe you don't feel it, but when I was reading what she wrote, I actually felt a weight or pull from below having to do with part of the context present which is not Love but Dualism. That level of intellectual thinking and awareness, and the things she said only really matter if you're resonant with being told the way YOU ARE YOURSELF by mistake, your mistake. The truth of Love is that it exists on a higher level.

This capacity we have for our higher selves to actually meet our lower selves decently and gracefully is where all twisted knots in one's baggage get resolved and undone. That is just another way of describing non-dual awareness and thought. It's all about being with the shadow of dualism in order to integrate the opposition.

The conclusion here is hopefully not being overstated. Your Gal's words represent a mental angle in which one's relationship to love by virtue of one's expressing oneself tenatively, reflects a work in progress in search of true self-respect and sovereignty. When one finds the truth of one's sovereignty (ask me how one does that?), the language one uses UNFOLDS and like a flower blossom, is LOVE expressing ... well, the existence of true love. As often heard associated to Zen, those who don't know speak, those who know keep silent.

- Part of an email response to my friend Colleen.

Desire Realigning, by Mervyn Brady

So rein in desire, do not desire----better sunshine, more food and turn your Eros to the Soul.  

The Greeks said that Eros gives wings to Psyche (the Soul).  

I say desire and its realigning is a most potent weapon in the arsenal of the true Philosopher.  

 It is interesting to sit down and really ask, what am I doing with my Eros?  

Christian morality messed with this one and connected Eros and Desire with the outlawed sexual functions?  

William Blake makes many references to Desire, of its proper uses.  

Do not just say the words and expect something to happen.  

Tomorrow morning your machine will wake up again--- what do you desire?? 

Desire to change, see what happens.  

This is the secret…  Using the energy of Desire, to be present. 

~Mervyn J. Brady

What I have to put up with ....

The Hard Shell of Imminence


I did not want to hear
Those words about it
Inevitable but hidden away
as sure as today is tonight, but not
as day is to night, death is to me.

It has thought me alive
Not otherwise as I believe
Until now, speaking with one I love
My first thoughts wept tears of loss
Crushing the hard shell of imminence.

This is only the beginning.

© 03/25/2004, RJDuberg

Arriving Home tonight after a good 5 mile cycle

Home Court Advatage - Imperial Beach

POETRY: Balance

Balance Where the song's beat is both fun and simple in practice making conscious a continuum range's spectral in-flux, proceedings are exercises in error recovery that's valid where there's no doubt that your head is calm and still. The essence of this infinity mirrors eternity, space/energy Why I ever thought that still point of thought, was poetry had more to do with how little life seemed aware, messy for such a singleminded obsessive focus over the details. 11/2013, rjd

POETRY: Listening in

Listening In

Ignorance obscures divine will
Necessary for integrity, honor, 
Ordinary world, machine culture - designed to stop Will - descendent path
seeing us playing the game, 
to Will, playing the game through us. 

Gurdjieff, a proud ancestor, he says
in fresh understandable jargon, his words
My Numen Will is a space of sovereignty

Free from the Exoteric 
a subject just as important
Study of delusion 
& spells of subservience

Hostile Anarchy still the option 
to avoid by all means possible
if it means delaying evolution
until... the next evolution
then…

My Girl Warrior - Jones

Don't Let the Warm Fuzzy Coat fool ya!

Waiting for Shiva

Have you ever woken up in the morning feeling empty—without the energy to make decisions or carry out a plan you made last night?
 
This morning I slept late for no reason, couldn’t get myself going, not even to meditate or do qigong. It was only after I dragged myself through breakfast and set off to the market that I realized my problem wasn’t with the body. It was with the heart. I was empty of feeling, perhaps depressed. That’s a very serious situation, a life challenge like no other. Who can function without feeling?
 
Happily, my state of tension and fear was eased once I recognized what was wrong. I felt somewhat better, even as the sense of emptiness remained. What to do? I went about my morning duties in a listening mode, inquiring of my heart what the rest of me could do to help.
 
In such a situation, an analogy can be very helpful: From the Hindu point of view, I am Shakti here below, waiting for Shiva. When will he come to waken her, curled up asleep at the center of my Being? When will her heart be gladdened by a ray from his sun, just what is needed to illumine and warm my heart? No idea. But, for the moment I know my job—to wait like a hunter for the slightest indication of his appearance.
 
How do you wait like a hunter? Many years ago, I heard a distinguished Frenchman, Henri Tracol, explain it to an unhappy man who didn’t like waiting. Perhaps the man was empty or depressed like me today. Perhaps he simply longed to understand why, although he’d spent many years trying to make a new beginning, to get rid of the things in himself he didn’t like, the change he longed for just didn’t come about. M. Tracol sat looking at him thoughtfully for a few minutes. Then he said: “You must wait. But you can wait like a hunter. A hunter will stand behind a tree or sit behind a rock for many hours, as still as the landscape, waiting for his prey to appear.”
 
Not so easy! To wait like a hunter I must learn to sit very still, to take control of my squirming or lax body so it can be still and yet very alive, ready to act instantly when the time comes. Knowing myself as I do, it sounds like that could take a long time! But the time won’t be wasted if it’s in the name of my deepest wish: The wish to know myself and to grow into the person I was born to be.
 
How to wait in front of the Unknown? What can I do, face to face with illness or loss or the Next Big Step in my life. While such challenges can give me opportunity for musing, for thinking about stuff, thinking is not enough. Unless I’m alert, like the six wise virgins, I may miss the chance to connect with a new thread in the fabric of my life.
 
We do a lot of waiting. Life’s like that. I wait for the bus or train, for the boss to give me a raise, for my own true love to find me, for the end of something that may actually be a new beginning. Which job should I take, which road should I travel to get where I think I want to go? Where do I really want to go?
 
And we often wait in the darkness. For help. For light. There’s a deep need to understand what’s going on in the world and in myself. Why are things the way they are? Why do terrible things happen to those I love? Why do good people do bad things? What should I do next?
 
I have a choice. Waiting can be boring or fraught with possibilities, it’s up to me to wait like a hunter. Awakening to the presence of Shiva might bring me a new approach to an old task, a new response instead of my habitual reactions, or a tentative new openness to whatever may come.
by

A few shots of Mavericks and Teahupoo

ooof!

any difference?

Riding Energy

    

I love this photograhy

Celebrate Now

Hi again

Everybody wants to hear
the sound that loves them
music for one, transcends
when the heart enjoys

resonation  deep in -
A medallion of calm
turns chaos to contrast
the celebration of life.

Nov 201, rj

Your money or your life?

A friend recently retorted why worry about it? He was refering to money and how it supposes to represent a person's wealth, but beyond that he could only admit to worrying about it on personal survival level at best. Good reasons for this, and yet quite beyond the pall of the mainstream at least. Why worry about it? It's not necessary to worry and one can even do away with it altogether and live life as an arhat, a wondering or reclusive eastern monk adorned with a piece of thread to for cover and a bowl to receive the charity society designates is sufficient in his/her presence.

For the rest of us that are participating on the wheel of samsara still, it's so interesting that even while we are all doing this together as one, it is only by bringing our corporeal existence to bear in coordindation with others that our life continues to exist and have a future. If this is true, why are we still operating individually. Perhaps the Rights which are protected by our USA may have finally reached their expiration date? But I am getting way ahead of myself, and money is a far more sexier and urgent necessity which I can literally feel pushing me right now, despite all creeds stating the truth to be otherwise.

Thus, our perception of others "wealth" accounts for the veracity of our ordinary lives, an orderliness that without being policed and maintained would uncover mankind's less social and civilly minded impulse's involving fear and aggression, violence and flight. This is a rather esoteric perspective because for the most part wealth and currency are simply misundertood entirely with the first incorrect belief being that money and wealth, the tokens that symbolize power, are scarce and 2nd that money is something living in something called banks. As my friend seemed to allude, money has meaning only in so far as a community or group of communities share that meaning.

However, he mentioned that its definition is based on the perceived wealth of others. I would challenge that for so many reasons. First of all the thought that money is imaginary itself is simply laughable. I know that what you meant to say was that by itself it has no intrinsic meaning or value, but to call the magnitude of money represented by very real digits circulating throughout societies banking systems as imaginary ... well, my man, that simply defies intelligent thought. Add to all of this the international banking community and its warehousing and redistribution of money in ways which profoundly distort and corrupt that value and such attitudes towards represent its speciifc limit on the return.

With all of our trite and impoverished ways of relating to money, defining ourselves by it instead of the truth which has always been its basis in tokenship, or the truth of our lives being defined by negotiation and substitution. Thus money is defined rightfully as a magnitude attached to a contract between men in which the value of money is an exchangeable commodity having universal applications, such that with my 2 cents in hand I can in a pinch trade them for a pencil I forgot to bring with me on my trip downtown to write poetry in the Museum's Plaza or along the harbor-side.

Reforming the financial institutions of our world is something which we can no longer avoid, because they no longer court higher thought and science, but have become demigods for those who roam those halls, and the principle message is he with the most toys wins or something along those lines.

What is so annoying is that we haven't even gotten to the point of having suggestions floating around necessary to augur our immediate future and our ability to pay for it.

IN closing ... please do not hold money at fault, although how easy is that to do? I've done it. Rather, see the real and vast need still very much present and growing in life for us to recreate our cultural schemes surrounding finance, which begin to show up as energetically supporting life (as in producing a belief called abundance instead of scarcity. The truth is twisted so far up into its own anus out of our perspective on money that it is not even funny. A change in perspective here however will express itself appropriately as a profound change in worldly perspective altogether, especially after money becomes abundant with the divine values of which every man born is endowed with. Yes, abolishing slavery was a magnificent and revolutionary step in this direction, but we almost killed everyone in the process and with all due respect to Lincoln seeing the war through on principle. The idea of human life Representing a Monetary Value has yet to be cleared from our collective consciousness or mercenaries would be a thing of the past, the most lucrative business in the past decade. 

You laugh, and I am here to say stop that.

Feels like a Sunday Morning to me for some reason, LOL.

Now addressing the younger Bush president of security at the White House I need to drop off old CD and pu Groceries and pu cinema from Greg

Enlightenment, Mystery and Perspective

The Mystery, still unseen, kills
The trick is getting your benefit
while leaving the beast to rest

Alright then, with respect to my own highest ideals regarding spiritual life, in particular, the one I refer to as Tantric, a yoga that at present is a meditation on affirming the power of affirmation through engagement (often recognized as postive reinforcement or acknowledgement and compliment).

And then again, not losing hold of the integral force of mind, but rather ... using it to vector our lives more precisely to our only purpose in this life which is as Swami Chinmayananda in Self-Unfoldment said "...Life principle supporting them all, the unchanging factor of all life. The enlightened being is one who has chosen this highest principle as his ideal and has dedicated all his activities to it."  So far so good, until he speaks of the state of enlightenment existing without emotionality, in some unsaid and subtlley implied logic, the Swami has stepped over a number of crucial points which together define the foundation of enlightenment for the human mind.

If one looks, emotionality is at the very heart and source of our attention. Quicker than any other functionality in man, most negative expressions of emotionality or simply false and old scripts and programming we clung to as children. The real truth to what he wants to say has to be a creative expression of how emotion actually allows us to perceive our lives as particularly human.

Without exasperating those listening, this quote by the Swami obviously leaves a bit to be desired. Mark S.G. Dyczkowski insightful remarks take on this task quite eloquently to the next level, keeping level and balanced with the mysteriousness of it all whether we're speaking of enlightenment or ignorance, but definitely corresponsponding who we are with that mysterious source yet providing an integral for this to evolve into a realtion to attention that allows us to be AUTHENTIC to whatever the truth is NOW.

Mark wrote, "Once we have overcome the negative forces that arise from our ignorance and prevent us from abiding in ourselves, we are liberated. To do this, we must penetrate through the pulsing fluctuations of objectively experienced states and perceptions at the surface level of consciousness and gain insight into the timeless rhythm of our own nature manifest in the universal arising and falling away of all things."

I give him kudos for his effort but not for anything significant in terms of a result. One could sum up all he has to say in the words The Enlightenment Gain. But wait, just when and how did the lower creep into this intellectual work? By being hidden behind a barney (if I am only admitting to yet being incorrect once again regarding a statement analysis by Regis which has to do with words being presented for their strength and specific flavor yet clearly having a signpost which is called the barney (?) in which such statements' truth is dependent on some degree of mystery which is rather an excuse to use those words instead of acknowledging that we no longer are empowered by them.

Before moving onto Sri Aurobindo, sit for a moment and contemplate Mark's continuing words as he writes, "To do this, we must penetrate through the pulsing fluctuations of objectively experienced states and perceptions at the surface level of consciousness and gain insight into the timeless rhythm of our own nature manifest in the universal arising and falling away of all things." Does the expression timeless rhythm really mean anything at all. If you check your dictionaries you'll find that it does not. It's like ascribing a certain attribute found and useful as a distinction in the world of fluid dynamics to solids. Feels close intuitively, and yet so far from our being able to articulate ourselves as such.

Sri is yet another evolution on this story which I will not include in this attack except to say that it ought to be clear on reading him how emotional he is and how important emotionality is to a man/woman'a ability to perceive. I think for my part at this juncture I will only submit this one correction to the overall perspective of enlightenment. I wrote of this recently in a poem titled The Mystery, and in the 2nd strophe wrote…

I have a destiny with a dragon
The Mystery, still unseen, kills
The trick is getting your benefit
while leaving the beast to rest.
 
Here in the west we want the ultimate reduction and a bank to deposit it in WITH INTEREST. We live constrained by our culture with so much ignorance and lack of perspective on life if only because we simply aren't even close to as smart as we would like to think we are.

I do think however, that I've reached a small jumping off point with respect to the prime ideal of life which we want to call enlightenment. We have to transcend culture, first by exposing ourselves to mankind's other cultures, and then by integrating and synthesizing the best of what we want. And succeeding in doing that brings us flat up against the wall. From here we can go no further, why? Because the process that got us this far in its neo-enlightened, integral, nonjudgmental, discerning, visionary, committed, philosophic thought represents the mind and the condition which is itself exclusionary to the truth.

Desire, the shroud and veil, prevents us from evolving ourselves timelessly. That leaves us only yoga as a viable hope towards fully realizing consciously Truth, Beauty, and Justice. Every desire exists out of the web of beliefs which make up our collective world views, except for those pertaining only to ourselves as individuals in the world. So there is that platitude in the process where one gives up or lets go of desire not because its right or intrinsic to attainment but because we have discovered how fundamentally it separates us from the Truth that ALL IS.  Funny though how this moment doesn't provide the level of breakthrough and enlightenment one would certainly consider possible given how fundamentally the condition of grasping, clinging, and needing prevents any nearness or taste of enlightenment whatsoever. Include the yogi platitude on the essential meaningless and emptiness of life as yet another major milestone however one that does not catapult one any further, but more or less just brings one to the point in which they stop believing in their own bullshit just as much as the rest. Life becomes peaceful and clear at this level of consciousness, and yet does this imply enlightenment?

I am called to return to the notion that one's desire to be enlightened ITSELF is enlightenment. In order to want this metaphysical liberty from illusionary egotism, is both the degree one might be said to be empowered to attain that state in the first place, and for a few who have come before me, there is clearly an artifact produced one might call the gift of the state of enlightenment, a teaching and a reaching out to humanity with a message for those who can hear to guide them on this path leading the soul out of the darkness of ignorance and into the purity of light which the truth shines infinitely.

a negate of a negated negation,
never gets the real truth, and yet
there's another energy transfer
labyrinths are key symbols for.
 
The next strophe I wrote was an attempt to acknowledge something of the heart of the desire which fulfills without fulfilling, that bath of paradoxical quagmire, wherein we are constantly challenged by our own mechanical responses entrained towards a dualistic structured society keeping our evolved engagement quite surreal until complete.

The Mystery

There's something in the way
certain women tell
a lie that was never there idea
and the messy blames begin.

I have a destiny with a dragon
The Mystery, still unseen, kills
The trick is getting your benefit
while leaving the beast to rest

a negate of a negated negation,
never gets the real truth, and yet
there's another energy transfer
labyrinths are key symbols for.

The pain is felt as a toxicity
draining, sapping, disturbing,
Yes, this homo sapien life
Where messy turned inward.

6/2013 rjduberg

Dedicated to my soul, goddess, and divine mercy...

Angel
by Sarah Maclaclan


Spend all your time waiting
For that second chance,
For a break that would make it okay.

There's always some reason
To feel not good enough,
And it's hard, at the end of the day.

I need some distraction,
Oh, beautiful release.
Memories seep from my veins.

Let me be empty,
Oh, and weightless, and maybe
I'll find some peace tonight.

In the arms of the angel,
Fly away from here,
From this dark, cold hotel room,
And the endlessness that you fear.
You are pulled from the wreckage,
Of your silent reverie.
You're in the arms of the angel,
May you find some comfort here.

So tired of the straight line,
And everywhere you turn,
There's vultures and thieves at your back.

The storm keeps on twisting.
Keep on building the lies
That you make up for all that you lack.

It don't make no difference,
Escape one last time.
It's easier to believe in this sweet madness,
Oh, this glorious sadness,
That brings me to my knees.

You're in the arms of the angel,
May you find some comfort here.

Saying it without saying it

Saying it without saying it

One example of this would be the state of breathlessness associated with part of my experience with wise and beautiful women. There's no saying that only breathing it.

Struggle of Ascension

Wrestling with an Angel

I love this painting by Rembrandt. I often feel this way and the knowledge that others do as well and that this may not be due to my defective self is something of a validation.

What though is this impulse to resist higher law and conscious influence? I struggle with it even as I am fully aware of its divinity and authority.

This struggle is nothing more than my egoism asserting itself before existence itself, even when it doesn't exist itself.

We would do well to invent a more illuminating narrative in our psychology, one which doesn't make things or conjure things up to explain the very conflicted and chaotic impulses and behavior which men and women express.

Ramblin' Rosie Mom


How often does your feeling resemble a tornado? In the positive sense of being swept up in a revolving twirling wind of information. Part of this dynamic flux has to do with realizing the only thing preventing us from anything in life is a negative belief. Letting someone declare it for you is another lame way as well. I should say rather that having any negative energy in opposition to your desire around is the quickest sabatoge I know of and the easiest way to not fulfill your desire.

Lately, I guess I've been feeling a lot better because I've seen a lot of shift in my attitude. I know I'm feeling good if I become absorbed in revelerie about a long ago left behind coming of age. Such indelible moments and memories, the happiest I've ever been, even though I was totally ignorant of who I really was.

Alright then, Gestalt Theory won the day again. Fritz Perls was its founder and it continues to be a key piece of knowlege shared between many different disiplines.

Until one begins to perceive silence as the most powerful communication of all, they will not have the ability to see enough to know they're in trouble. Knowing, or getting in touch with as some now say something truthfully doesn't change anything. And the usual ordinary way we exercise our will towards some specific ends is ass backwards and false anyhow.

There is a real solid gold nugget to be found in this process dig, which is when you can divide your attention between the material world and conscious energetic world. If you do that, I don't think there is anything else as powerful for producing a breakthrough into higher consciousness.

Will Power

In order to go with gusto
where the power of will, will
make a difference now
One has to remember
to set the polarity for all
both the blind and seeing
From the material need
one includes the negation
and along with that, arises
the opposite, and a snickers.

The one thing will will not
yet, in respect to chocolate
caramel bite sized candy
called Risens ~ yum yum.

2013 rj

What ENTITLEMENT between people means?


I guess it's no surprise when my first recollection here was a beginning observation regarding how people are unconsciously always viewing and acting in life TO LOOK GOOD. Imagine the permutations on that formula. I don't know that I understand what exactly you meant by superior. IS it his thinking he's superior when he's not, claiming he's superior, acting superior, a superior idiot, LOL - It all seems to reflect our need to LOOK GOOD, by some personal standard mostly a legacy of the culture we grew up in.

But I mean it's one of those things that need an anchor or at least anecdotal reference for them to really work in communicating or relating, for that matter.

Don't forget that in any conflict we have with another, a portion of our commuication is projection, and it is precisely this portion of our communication which is the source of our feeling conflicted at that moment.

The entire story though, if I get you well enough, is what? A displeasure with the way men cope with you as a female? Your drawing a picture which has been drawn over and over throughout time. It does mean anything except that the LINES OF YOUR COMMUNICATION are shewed. The rest your making up about it. The question I think trumps this one is how do these LINES become skewed, which to me seems like a question about a blindness we have or something we're seemingly unaware of.

Given that I don't have a quick answer for that I'll stop here, except to say that one of the LINES that I have found skewing from time to time and at least enough times that the point of lapse became clear to a degree that I can report it fair and succinctly as HUMOR. We often lose our humor, forget about it's value, but basically stop using it when it is really essential to our communication with others being fulfilling, revealing, supporting, encouraging, empowering, and well-received.

I definitely used to take myself a little bit to seriously. It does help to laugh at oneself. If I think of anymore I'll add them...

A place to address one's soul ...

You have to be able to have it, though you often fail to do this. The reason is inner chaos fragmenting your basic integrity as a person. I'm still striving for balance I guess, beginning with some basic alignments. Now there's a hot therapy, re: Alignments.

The central idea would be that balanced moves along with you as your wheel in time goes around, it's position however remaining in the center of the wheel, turning and thus moving along but otherwise staying unchanged along the x,y.

Balance will continue to appear the same at the wheels edge until that day you choose to let this go for something else? Recommend a proactive approach so one doesn't lapse into a culdesac and get stuck.

Stuck is different than having a balance on x,y. Stuck is stuck. LOL

Order and Chaos

I can only emphasize the importance of one's intent (or wish) in the matter. To the degree that you can be both the wish and what is NOT, is the degree to which you can realize your self as source in life.

Life is a movement and LOL, looking around one can see the chaos of movement everywhere yes? For oneself, this is no different for most, their consciousness is a web of oppositional even diametrically opposed desires, impulses, conditionings, etc.

The most important question in this is then what shall be the organizing principle to all of this? What will be the primary wish behind and around which all other wishes order themselves and organize?

Why put it like this? Well, if you actually look, you may see, for yourself. And, what could be more important than that?

Where you don't expect to find it

Charisma, you see it most among your friends. An intense form of contact which always appears as a magnetic attraction, based on two positives, exchanging views and ideas about a double negative they are tugging at against each other.

It's the expansion afterwards full of mystery and divine grace, you shift into Heavy Memory Modes. Sounds like a great blog title or band even.

and so on...